Keeping Up Appearances

Last week, I almost had a mental breakdown in the union. #truelife 
I was studying for an exam, got distracted by schedule planning and thought about completely changing my major (read: 180 degree flip of my major). There’s a lot riding on this semester & last week was not easy. It all hit me as I thought about what my plan B was going to be. 
Thankfully, I had my super awesome roommate H with me & we started talking about the appearance of having it all figured out. Before she started living with me, H thought I had it all together. She thought I had a plan for my life & I knew exactly what I was aiming for. She couldn’t be more wrong. 
When it comes to my day to day life, I’ve pretty much got it figured out. With my weekly to-do lists and not a lot of unexpected change, I can take on the world. But my long term plan? I couldn’t tell you. This doesn’t mean I don’t have a plan at all, I have some general ideas but I would rather see where life takes me. 

I live by the fake till you make it philosophy. If I don’t know exactly what I’m doing, it’s okay because I assume I’ll figure it out on the way. In my mind, life is an adventure & I plan to treat it as such. Whether it’s a trip to Europe or a plan to keep my desk clean, a goal is a goal. Sometimes my need for control gets in the way of spontaneity. But I also believe in courage – being scared to death of something & doing it anyway. 
Today’s lesson? Have a little faith & a lot of courage. It’s okay to not have an exact plan – life has a funny way of working itself out. 

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